ɴᴀʀᴄɪssɪsᴛs ᴀʀᴇ ᴍᴀsᴛᴇʀs ᴏғ ᴘᴀᴛʜᴏʟᴏɢɪᴢɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴇᴍᴏᴛɪᴏɴs. ᴛʜᴇʏ ᴄᴏɴᴠɪɴᴄᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴇᴍᴏᴛɪᴏɴᴀʟ ʀᴇᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴs ᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇɪʀ ᴀʙᴜsᴇ ᴀʀᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴘʀᴏʙʟᴇᴍ, ʀᴀᴛʜᴇʀ ᴛʜᴀɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴀʙᴜsᴇ ɪᴛsᴇʟғ.
Below are some common traits that a narcissistic relationship partner is likely to have:
– Sense of entitlement or superiority
– Lack of empathy
– Manipulative behavior
– Strong need for admiration
– Focus on getting one’s own needs met, often ignoring the needs of others
– Higher levels of aggression
– Difficulty taking feedback about their behavior
Red flags that indicate you are having a relationship with a narcissist:
– You find yourself explaining the basic elements of human respect to a full-grown adult
– They focus on your mistakes and ignore their own
– They are suddenly & completely bored by you
– ᴛʜᴇʏ ᴀᴄᴄᴜsᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴏғ ᴇᴍᴏᴛɪᴏɴs ᴛʜᴇʏ ɪɴᴛᴇɴᴛɪᴏɴᴀʟʟʏ ᴘʀᴏᴠᴏᴋᴇ
– They expect you to read their mind
– They have a crippling thirst for attention
– You fear that any fight could be your last
A man with a narcissistic personality traits will not take accountability for his behavior. He is masterful at pointing the
finger at you. You are responsible for any and all negativity in your relationship. You are like a broken compass: the needle
of the problem is always pointed on you.
A narcissist is a king at being an emotional predator. He has no remorse for his narcissism. That is who is he.
He wants to be loved just the way he is; yet, he does not accept affection the way you want to give it.
He asks for unconditional trust, yet he is not willing to give respect in return.
The relationship is 100% on his terms.
The narcissist is unwilling or unable to empathize with the needs, wants, or feelings of his partner. This also makes it very
difficult for him to take responsibility for his own behavior.
At first the narcissist is usually very charming, interesting, caring. He gravitates toward grandiosity and fantasy. The relationship with
him feels like a fairytale at the beginning – he compliments you constantly and tell you he loves you within the first two weeks emphasizing
how compatible you are even if you just started to see each other.
As the Mr. Right mask falls, the Narcissist starts to gaslight you.
Gaslighting is a form of manipulation and emotional abuse and it’s
a hallmark of narcissism. He may tell blatant lies, falsely accuse others, spin the truth, and ultimately distort your reality – especially
in response to perceived challenges of authority. Signs of gaslighting (I personally suffered) include the following:
– you no longer feel like the person you used to be
– you feel more anxious and less confident than you used to be
– you often wonder if you’re being too sensitive
– you feel like everything you do is wrong
– you always think it’s your fault when things go wrong
– you’re apologizing often
– you have a sense that something is wrong, but aren’t able to identify what it is
– you often question whether your response to your partner is appropriate
– you make excuses for your partner’s behavior
Realizing that you identify with these signs of a narcissistic partner is frightening and hard to face. You’re in love with a
When I experienced it, I used to think: "But I love him, so should I really end my relationship because of this narcissistic personality
traits?" If you are in the same situation you should ask yourself if you agree with these statements:
– You are comfortable with your partner calling all of the shots.
– You are comfortable with agreeing to all of his demands.
– You don’t have any needs of your own that are not in lock step with his.
– You don’t mind if he seeks out other women as "friends".
– You are comfortable if he flirts with other women, saying only, "They mean nothing".
– You are okay with not commenting, not interacting, not discussing his social media accounts.
– You are okay with not being a priority in his life.
How long should you stay in a relationship once you’ve realized your boyfriend has narcissistic personality traits?
If you answer to all of the above is "yes": you should stay with him forever.
If your answer to even one or more of the above is "no": not for even one day longer.
If you think your love, your patience, your waiting and tollerance might change your narcissist boyfriend… well, you’re wrong.
He will never change and you’d better off before of falling into a dangerous trap made of depression and low-self esteem.
"The main condition for the achievement of love is the overcoming of one’s narcissism" (Erich Fromm)
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